How To Die as a Happy Man – Do What You Love, and Do it WEell
I predict that in your life, you have around 25.000 days to live. That’s 613.000 hours.
Almost half of your life you’re asleep. That’s 400.000 hours left.
Working. 250.000 hours left.
And driving. 200.000 hours left.
OK, I admit it. I almost made these numbers up. Of course some people drive to work more than others, but the numbers do have one foot in reality. What do you spend your time on?
I know for sure that very few people lay on their death bed saying “Oh darn, I wish I worked more and spent less time on my family”.
And I also know that all this is nothing new. But it’s the mindset that’s important here.
Time doesn’t wait
That’s OK because I don’t wait for time
If you must do something, do it now. You never know if there’s a tomorrow.
Sometimes things need some thought and reflection to work. The important thing is just to do things with a goal in mind.
I try to live by the rule of always doing my best. I don’t really have any time to waste, so why not do what I can while I still can?
Every workout, every interaction, every everything, I do my best. And if it’s not good enough, I learn from it.
And that’s one of the biggest wonders in life. We’re all on a journey, life is one big education. As I’ve said before, if you learn something from something, you haven’t “lost” a thing. You have grown.
And that’s what “positive thinking” is all about for me; seeing the good side of the bad. Every coin has two sides you know…
Wait! How does all of this relate to dating?
Now I’m going to come out and say something a little provoking: Everything relates to dating!
Because dating in itself means nothing. Let me explain: We all have some higher goal. For most people it is about being happy.
And that’s probably why you’re reading this. On some level, you want to be happy. Dating beautiful women is just one way to get there.
The core of most dating advice is to get your life handled. It’s a process, and learning “dating science” is one big development. On the way, you’re going to get other parts of your life handled too. It’s natural.
As a human, you’re smart enough to relate. You can see why A relates to B. Even if you’ve never encountered problem B, you can use the knowledge you gained from solving problem A to solve B.
In the dating world, it’s often called Inner Game. It’s the games that run inside of your mind. It’s how you react to new situations. It’s how you think and reflect. It’s the voice, not the words.
You can learn all of the lines and routines in the world, but there will always be something you’re not prepared to deal with. With all the lines and routines you can entertain her for 30 minutes… Then what?
Gaining the right beliefs and right mindsets is alfa-omega when it comes to getting the part of your life handled that’s called “Women and Se.x.”
Lately, there has been a shift in the whole “seduction community”. People have begun to realize that dating itself is only the tip of the iceberg. To get really good, you need to get your inner game handled. You need to get your whole life handled.
It’s really all about being a man. And maybe not just A man. THE man.
Do what you love, I know I do
One way to getting your life handled is to do things that you love. Don’t spend too much time on things that doesn’t mean anything to you.
Personally, one of the things that I do is to eat only quality food. I don’t spend time and money and things that I don’t like and that aren’t good for me.
I try to cook all of my meals myself, and I love cooking just as much as I enjoy eating.
And while I’m cooking, I listen to music. Music is also one of my big passions.
I don’t spend time watching TV.
When I workout, I love every minute of it. I don’t have time not to love everything I do.
Just reading through what I just wrote, I realize that I may sound like some hippie-jesus type that’s always 100% happy.
But that’s far from the truth. When I’m sad, I’m sad. Even when I feel bad, I do it with my best.
Being sick is a part of life. I don’t want to distract myself from it. When I’m sick, I’m sick. When you’re feeling bad, you kind of take a step back and review your life, and I think that’s fantastic.
When I workout, I also really like to feel the pain. I don’t want to distract myself from one of life’s joys – to live, and to feel that I am alive!
I really live through my emotions, and my emotions live through me.
So this is basically just a reminder to everyone: Don’t ever forget that you’re alive. You’re incredibly lucky to be so.
How about you?
Phew, that was a heavy post. I hope that it won’t be misunderstood. If there’s anything that sounds strange or something you’d like more info on, just ask. I’m open to any kind of questions!
And I’d also like to know more about you. What are your goals? How do you live? What do you spend your time on?
Let me hear your thoughts.
Ladies and Gentlemen, the comment section is now open!
Image #1, #2 and #3 by Shutterhack, Karsten W. and LundaDiRimeel.
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Alex,
You’re absolutely right. Life is so short and you never know when you’re going to check out. We ARE VERY lucky to be here and alive. There is so much out there to see and do and live and experience. You’ve probably seen my name from the “how to get over your ex” post. I broke up with my ex three months ago and I admit I’m still kind of down but you know after reading this post, it just opens my eyes and I have to tell myself that life is too short to be hung up on this ONE girl. Yeah it was great while it lasted but it’s over now and now I have to move on with my life. We tend to get stuck in a routine and sometimes you just have to change it up a bit. I like to travel. And my goal is to visit all the countries I can. You’re so right about keeping a positive mind set. You’d be surprise how much happier you are if you just look at the bright side of things like you said. Keep up the good work! Love this site!
Sergio,
Of course I’ve seen your name around ;)
I just wanted to tell you that you have an amazing mindset. This is the kind of thoughts that go into creating a really extraordinary life for yourself.
Maybe not on the outside, but on the inside, and that’s what really counts. You could have hundreds of girls and big houses and boats and cars, and still be a miserable dude sitting alone watching TV. It all happens inside your mind. Those hundred girls and big houses wouldn’t be the worst thing that could happen, though…
Anyway, keep up the GREAT work yourself, you’re really starting to “get it” as you might say! Wonderful to see, I’m sure you’re going to have some fantastic years ahead.
Good luck with girls in the future and life in general!
See you around on the blog, glad you enjoy it.
Alex
Hi Alex, Can I say that you’re an extremist? :)
Thanks for the article I make my days count too. ;)
Raymond,
Yes, sure! I’m an “extremist” in some cases. But I also believe that everything should be balanced… Even balance!
Thanks for your comment, glad to know you’re doing good.
Hi Alex,
I`ve always known this – and I really hate it. Life is so much fun – why is it so short?? And all that people do is just work, sleep, eat and drive – that`s a rat race… Great article – something to think about!
“almost half of [613.000hrs]” on my calculator results in <306.500hrs which might result in a leftover of 310.000 up to maybe 350.000hrs…
Yes I surely hope so “Fighter”…
You shouldn’t hate it though, you know, “you can’t change the cards you get, only the way you play them”.
Or if you’re more of a sailor: “You can’t change the direction of the wind, but you can change the direction of your sails”.
or something like that. Anyway, it rings a bell for me!
oldschol, yeah, I just said “almost”. Thanks for pointing it out though, but it’s not because I’m bad at math that I chose that number. I just think it was more realistic.
Alex
*smile* I really enjoyed reading this. For someone who doesn’t date much, I’m sure getting that education in here huh.
I think its incredible that you experience life to the fullest the way you do. Just BEING is so important..so simple.. and yet we don’t do it.
I was taken aback when you said you allowed yourself to be sad. I was sad last night in fact and I think I made it 10 times worse because I spent SO much time being upset about being sad.
Yes, I’m serious.
To surrender to the feeling while it last is actually a move of strength.
Dating IS just the tip of the iceberg. Alex, thanks for highlighting this very important lesson. Wonderful article as usual
-THE woMan :)
JEMi,
awww. Thanks cutey!
Exactly. JUST BEING. So simple, and still so hard for so many. Also just saying to yourself that “you’re enough”.
The media and the internet and marketers and everyone keep telling us that there’s this new big thing that will “make us better”. I do it in a way too.
But everyone is really “enough” in him or herself. Sure, some things could be “changed”, but I think you get my point. Or maybe not! :)
Whatever. Great to hear your story, and you’re so right about surrendering. It really is a move of strength.
As always lovin’ your comments.
Keep well!
Excellent post, and so true! One of the hardest parts is to figure out what you really want out of life and what your goals are, so you can focus your energy on achieving them.
You offer some great philosophical advice though and it really hits home for me. Thanks!
That’s great muscle guy! Always love to stir some thoughts.
You’re right about goals and life and what you really want to achieve. I think it’s important to actually know what you want.
What do you want?
Dudddeee… great post!!
You really did nail it with this one!!
I’m personally only now comming to grips with this one. It’s a only a little while ago that I realised that Dating is one of those things that requires you to master a number of discplines (confidence, dress, oratory skills + more) – and as you get better at one it, magically somehow improves the others too!!
I used to be the type of guy who’d walk up to a woman and try to seduce her with one line (wanna be James Bond) – I obviosuly know better now – and of course I’ve been having much more success!!
I agree with “Muscle Post” – the hardest part is finding out what you want but my biggest problem is maintaining focus. I graduated from university a 8 months ago and I’m still in that ‘student mode’ – my day doesn’t start till 1pm.. I’m normally groggy for atleast 2hours after I wake.. anyone have a cure/advice/tips for this? Or is it just me?
Keep up with the great posts Alex.
Will
Will, Will, Will,
good to hear from you again!
I think you’re saying a lot of great stuff in this comment.
So right about “mastering diciplines”. It’s really the whole package. Would love to see a “James Bond” attempt, could be fun…
The best “cure” or “advice” is simply to say to yourself that it’s a problem, and that it’s something you’d like to fix. You would be amazed if you know what you’re really capable of achieving.
Set your alarm at 9AM, and GET UP. Every day. At least for a week. And don’t jump back into bed or something like that, stay up. One thing that works for me is to set my alarm at the other end of the room, so I have to walk over to turn it off.
Oh, and don’t drink coffee. In the long term it’s just a bad habit to have to wake up. Let a lot of sunlight in early too, that’s the natural way for the body to know it has to get up. Maybe get outside for a minute or two, just to breath in some fresh air.
Might be of use, let me know :)
Thanks for all the kind words, and I’ll see your around mate!
Alex
Thanks Alex,
I’ll give your method a go..!!
Will
You’re welcome William,
Good luck with it!
And as always, use the about page contact form for any questions.
Thank you Alex for having my humble photo on your great blog, with your beautiful words accompanying the photo it has made me so proud.
Shutterhack, it is I who thank you!
It’s a fantastic photo, really.
This worked for both my brother and I.
Try it yourself!
Thanks, Alex
That’s great, a!
You’re welcome.
Great post, I’ve always had this feeling about life which is that I find it strange how so many people live an almost identical life. When you think about it, the lives of most people follow the same path and this is especially sad when they spend it doing a job they hate or being unhappy.
We’ve only got the one life (although some would no doubt disagree) so surely its worth spending it doing things which make you and everyone around you happy. Bad things happen, but its about taking these in your stride and making your life exactly how you dreamed it to be.
Just as a last word, I think this site is really good, and I also like the fact you take the time to reply to virtually all of the comments made on your blogs, rather than distancing yourself like some of the writers of similar blogs do.
Keep writing mate, I’ll keep reading.
Adam,
Thank you so much for your encouraging words! It means a lot :-)
I agree on everything you say. We do only have one life, at least as far as I know. And isn’t that for the best, anyway? Then we actually have to take some responsability.
Stop by again, and keep well.